Monthly Archives: September 2016

The Myth of Balance

We’ve been sold a myth that somehow we can find a balance, a perfect equilibrium, in our lives.  Sometimes we are even shamed for not having found that sweet spot.

Balance implies that we have some scale and on each side are equal parts of a whole.  Or that different portions of our lives are divided up and pitted against each other.  Usually it is not possible, or even valuable, to compartmentalize our lives because all if it is woven together into whole cloth.

Needs ebb and flow.  Life changes regularly.

Work/Life Balance

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The Importance of Inconveniencing Yourself

Have you ever heard of a billionaire who built their business when they got ‘around to it’?  An epic love story that was ‘fit into a schedule’? A good parent who ignores a child because they have something more interesting to do?  How about being able to keep a job when you only go into work fully rested and motivated to work?

Convenience is a great quality when it comes to shopping, banking, doctor appointments, and your commute to work.  It is absolutely counter productive as a component in making life decisions.  Nothing great is ever created without inconveniencing yourself. Continue reading

How to Get Unstuck with Baby Steps

I was walking down the street and happened to see a man sitting on his porch. Next to the man was his dog, who was and whimpering. I asked the man “What’s wrong with your dog?” The man said “He’s laying on a nail”. I asked “Laying on a nail?, Well why doesn’t he get up?” The man then replied “It’s not hurting bad enough.”

I believe that story is by Les Brown and many motivational speakers have used it since.  It keeps getting recycled because it is so true.  Change is hard. Sometimes it takes more motivation than you think. Sometimes it is easier to stay with the devil you know instead of leaving with the devil you don’t.  What many people miss in that story is that the dog doesn’t need to do anything dramatic to change or to alleviate his discomfort.  He just has to get up.  That’s it.  He doesn’t have to go find a new dog house, he doesn’t have to find a new owner, he doesn’t even have to find a new porch, he just has to get up! Continue reading

How to Throw a Proper Pity Party

We all need a pity party once in awhile.

Plans don’t come to fruition. People hurt you. Murphy (the famous one, from Murphy’s Law) shows up at your house and doesn’t leave. Loved ones are sick. You got screwed over at your job. The list could go on and on.  Shit happens.  What is the best way to deal with it?

It is ok to be angry or sad or disappointed or whatever it is you are feeling.  Popular psychology states that validation is important.  You can validate your feelings with a pity party.  Let’s take a look at it as if it were any other party and you are the party planner. Continue reading